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pot

My main gripe with pot smokers isn't that I don't like my public bathrooms smelling the way they do... it's the fact that they're implicitly supporting the violence that is going on in Mexico. Drug users in general provide the major source of revenue for violent groups (e.g. those that kill US troops in Afghanistan).

So I understand the whole legalize pot mentality (and I think it's sort of bogus), but until pot - of the non-medicinal variety - is legalized, there really is no excuse for smoking it. It irks me that pot smokers in SF are so blatant about it. I'm surprised there isn't some sort of statewide campaign to label pot smoking as unpatriotic (or something else, I don't think pot smokers in general are too keen about being patriotic).

As for legalizing pot... if it were up to me, tobacco products would be illegal. Alcohol wouldn't. There are responsible ways to drink alcohol, there aren't any responsible ways to smoke or chew. Besides, the government has a history of regulating self-destructive behavior (e.g. seatbelt laws and suicide laws). But I don't feel strongly either way.

taiwan

Now I know what it feels like to be illiterate... well, more like illiterate and mute. The other day I was at a restaurant, and when it was my turn to order all I knew how to do was point at different pictures on the menu and say "can I have this?", haha.

I've always wondered how different I'd be if I had grown up in Asia. The culture and language (does one influence the other?) certainly would have made me a different person. But more importantly, the set of people I could relate to would be completely different. I'm sure there are people here I could probably be good friends with if they had only grown up in the states; right now, though, my relationships with them are limited to the superficial-type. Not that this is an incredible tragedy (it's not like I'm super social and have deep relationships with everyone back home), but the idea that some people are fundamentally "off-limits", to me anyway, is weird? Although really, personality differences often create larger barriers than any cultural differences could.

contractors

So I talked to an Iraq war vet last week, and we got to the topic of military contractors (e.g. Blackwater; contractors in general usually get a ton of bad press). He mentioned a viewpoint not really found in the media, that I found interesting.

Say you're in the US military, on patrol, and you come under attack. You can radio in air support, support from other nearby units, etc. There's always a way out, usually within a few hours. That's not to say you won't suffer casualties, but for every ambush, there will almost always be survivors. So you can take the time to do your job right. Now say you're a contractor, and you're ambushed. There are no direct lines of communication with the US or allied military. The company you work for won't have any sort of air support capability, and there are no nearby friendly units you can call on. You're basically dead. And it's usually not just some of you, it's all of you. To prevent this, contractors will drive extremely quickly through traffic, disobeying traffic laws; and if attacked, they'll fire every weapon they have at their perceived threat before quickly running away.

The way I see it, this means a few things:

1) Contractors aren't reckless for no reason, as is often portrayed in the media. They have an incentive to be reckless. (This isn't to say that there aren't forms of recklessness that are unnecessary, e.g. instances of being intoxicated while on the job).

2) The idea of using contractors is fundamentally flawed. No additional laws, regulations, or added oversight will curb this reckless behavior.

3) If you're going to take the time to integrate the operations of contractors with that of the military, you might as well field the additional cost of simply deploying a few extra units.

It still boggles my mind that there are private companies selling security services in war zones. But then again, the military was designed to win wars, not escort important persons, etc.

bed

This is a picture of my bed. I got the blankets, pillow case, and sheets separately, each time going for the same shade of blue. As you can see, I clearly failed, but I kinda like how everything worked out :)

tennis

So I'm taking a tennis class here. And yes, I know what you're thinking. Why're you taking tennis lessons, you're so good at it already! I know. It's true. But most of the dance classes this quarter conflict with the classes I really want to take.

Joking aside, though, I really look forward to tennis class :) The other day, we had a competition to see who could hit the most balls into the court from a ball machine, and I won a can of new tennis balls! I totally feel like a middle schooler again.

manna

"What? People in Manna date each other? That seems so... incestuous."

- Joce

Looks like things haven't changed much.

food

So apparently you can make teriyaki sauce with just soy sauce, sugar, and mirin (the last of which I happen to have, coincidentally, since I use it to make spam musubis). Once I get something to work, though, I usually stick with it until I get tired of it. So I guess I'll be having teriyaki chicken for dinner for the next couple of days. Maybe with broccoli. Because that's the only vegetable I cook.

Man, I am such a bum.

studio

So after being homeless for a week, and mostly sleeping on couches, I finally moved into my studio (which wasn't what I planned on, but at least it's in a good location, close to people, etc). But the best part of living by yourself? Not having to close the door when you use the bathroom.

generosity

It's hard to be generous with other people if you're not generous with yourself.

weddings

"It's an honor to get invited to a wedding, because it shows that you were an important part of the bride/groom's life. But when you actually show up for the wedding, you realize how little a part of the bride/groom's life you were."
- John Lin (paraphrased)

desire

"If desire did not dim the brain, nobody would ever get married, drunk, or fat."

- Valentine Wiggin, from one of the best sci-fi novel series ever.

Reread this on my flight to new york. Okay, so my first reaction was: this is more clever than true. But 1 Corinthians 7 (among other passages) seems to corroborate it.

As a witty quote, this one is pretty awesome. But beyond that, it doesn't sit well with me. Maybe it's because in the very same series (albeit a different book), having and raising children is extolled as one of the most meaningful things you can do in your life. And you can't really do that without being married, huh? (or I suppose you can, ...)

government

The government is soooo inefficient, in so many ways. But so far, that's its worst flaw as far as I can tell. The way I see it, better widespread inefficiency than widespread corruption. On a sidenote, I've been in a corporate environment that was much worse (but the company I worked at almost went under, and eventually got bought out, so maybe not the best example, haha).

On the plus side, being in an imperfect environment means that there's a lot of room for improvement. I feel like I can make a difference here, whereas if I were in a more streamlined workplace I'd just be a cog in a well-oiled wheel? Or maybe that's just what I tell myself to make myself feel better :)

Was considering leaving the program, but after some thought, I think I'll stick with it.

deism

You know how some people say it's easy to be a practical atheist? I think the term practical deist is much more apt. I still go through the motions (something an atheist doesn't do), but do I really believe in God's power to affect my day to day life?

E.g. if I really believed in the power of prayer, not only would I pray (a lot) more, I'd ask people to pray for me more. A lot of times, I'm hesitant to ask people to pray for me because I feel like I'm being a burden by asking them to do so. But maybe 1) this is because I find praying for other people to be a burden sometimes and 2) it's okay that it's a burden, because we're called to bear other people's burdens?

p.s. I am totally guilty of saying I'll pray for someone, and then completely forgetting later on. More often, though, I'll make up a 5 second prayer in my head just so I can tell myself I didn't break any promises. I'm a horrible person, I know.

On a somewhat related note, someone mentioned how a lot of theologians will say that God can affect nature (storms, hurricanes, etc) but that he cannot affect anything related to human will. And if you believe that, you might as well be a deist, because 90+% of our lives are affected by our own decisions and the decisions of others (e.g. the placement of roads, choice of schools to attend, etc.). And I guess I never believed that on an intellectual level (don't we pray that his will will be ours? something we cannot accomplish on our own), but practically, I fall into that mentality a lot.

lost

There's a guy living in the hatch thing!

Man, I'm way behind, huh? It's like that xkcd about Portal. Oh well...

work

So, work's been fun. Not much to say. Not much I can say, since everything's top secret! Actually, not really. I don't do any secret things. But if you're wondering, I'm working on developing the next generation radar jammer for the EA-18G, which, incidentally, is very cool (you can take my word for it).

I'm slowly meeting people here. And I'm trying to find a church to attend. I think I'm the only asian here for miles and miles. Man, I wish I took some español in high school. Latin is so, um, worthless haha.

first john

How do you reconcile:
1 John 1:8 "If we say that we have no sin, we are deceiving ourselves and the truth is not in us."
with:
1 John 3:9 "No one who is born of God practices sin, because His seed abides in him; and he cannot sin, because he is born of God."

Are none of us then, born of God? The best explanation I've heard (I'm beginning to feel a need to write down these small insights) is as follows:

Suppose one day Ryan Bayer* comes home from (middle) school after having cheated on a test. His father, having already heard about this incident, proceeds to lecture little Bayer. One of the first things he says, and rather sternly, too, is "Bayer's don't cheat." But clearly, they do (as Ryan has just demonstrated).

What's happening here is that Ryan's dad, while reprimanding him, is also trying to exhort him to live up to his name. Similarly, when John claims that no one who is born of God practices sin, he is not making a statement of fact, but rather an exhortation for us to live up to what we are called to be?

* This story works better when the main character has a polysyllabic last name (i.e. white), and Ryan doesn't read this blog anyway.

april fools

Only one of the following can be considered an April Fool's joke:

1) My sister got into Princeton! (as well as every other school she applied to, including Stanford, MIT, etc).
2) I have a huge crush on an undergrad girl, and asked her out today. She said she'll have to think about it :(

baba yetu

Civ 4 theme song (great game, btw). One of the a capella groups at Stanford also sings this. One of the youtube comments: "Omg i never thought a load of rubbish would sound so good!", haha.

nerdington

Def: an entire town of nerds. Or, a last name.

You're a town, and a last name. Congrats!

p.s. Happy Pi Day

how i make friends

I find someone who is really nice and outgoing, and become friends with him. Then over time, I get to know the people he knows (although, that's usually not my original intention, promise!).